by Roz Warren

Before I sat down to make my  New Year’s Resolutions for 2020, I did a little research. According to the internet, the ten most popular New Year’s Resolutions are:

(1) Lose Weight

(2) Exercise

(3) Improve Your Finances

(4) Learn a New Skill

(5) Quit Smoking

(6) Read More

(7) Find a better job.

(8) Drink less alcohol

(9) Eat more healthfully

(10) Spend more time with friends and family.

In other words? Everyone wants to be more like me in 2020.

Exercise? I swim every day and walk everywhere.

Lose weight? Because of all of that walking and swimming? I’ve got no weight to lose.

Quit Smoking and drink less alcohol? I neither drink nor smoke.

Eat More Healthfully? I have no choice. I have Meniere’s Disease , which means that I can’t eat salt. And food that is delicious but unhealthful is loaded with salt. So no junk food for me, dammit.

Learn a New Skill? I’m learning to play the piano again. Technically, piano playing is an old skill, since I played when I was young. But I’m currently so bad at it that it feels like I’m learning a new skill.

Improve my finances? At 65, I have enough money to support my (ridiculously frugal) lifestyle for the rest of my life. I’ll never be able to buy a yacht. But I don’t want to buy a yacht.

Find a better job? Are you kidding me? I work at my local public library. I’ve already got the best job there is.

Read More? I work in a library. Reading is my life. (Although I rarely have time to read on the job. Librarians-who-get-paid-to-read-all-day is a myth. But I do get first dibs on all the best books!)

Spend More Time With Friends and Family. I have a great bunch of friends and I see them often. And my sister who is my best friend, lives nearby and I see her almost every day.

Local librarian Roz Warren is the author of “Our Bodies, Our Shelves: Library Humor.” She has written for many local and national publications and websites.