by Dr. Vanessa Chan

Ed. Note: Dr. Vanessa Chan, a resident of Chestnut Hill, gave a commencement address on May 12 for University of Pennsylvania’s undergraduate School of Engineering and Applied Sciences. Here is part of that speech. You can read the entire speech at www.failingislikefarting.com.

Twenty-four years ago, I sat in the Palestra waiting to get my degree, likely in these exact same folding chairs. I was relieved that the recurring nightmare, that I had forgotten to take a class and wouldn’t graduate, did not come true. You all know the one…

I am honored to revisit this place from a different vantage point as your commencement speaker. Although I'm not world famous, I will do my best to be memorable. I hope I’m off to a great start with this highly flattering fashion statement from my PhD which conveniently also doubles as a shower cap. You guys should really look at the regalia before you choose where to get your Ph.D.

I was asked to speak about how I forged my path. I could humble-brag and share the Facebook post version. One that airbrushes out giant potholes that SWALLOWED ME WHOLE. Instead, I thought I'd use this prestigious forum to openly talk about my failures. Why? I want you graduates to know a secret.

•Failing is like farting. It's natural. We all do it. We just don't like to admit it. Like when my Ph.D. defense was delayed because I missed a deadline (pothole), or when my factory messed up my order for QVC (crevice), or when I was forced out of a client situation that felt impossible to recover from (deep abyss). Some of these I fell into because of my own stupidity. Some, I got shoved into because of corporate politics, while others I leaped in to explore the unknown.

Regardless of the reason, you will fall into huge potholes, just like all of us. So today, I'm going to give you some tools to throw in your trunk to help you get out…

•Take the time to say thank you. My students write thank you cards as their last assignment. No one has to help you, so take the time to thank those who do, even if it’s their job. Graduates, please find your family and give them a hearty wave or blow a kiss. “Mom and dad, thank you for all you've done. For sacrificing for my dreams. For loving me unconditionally when I roll my eyes." Graduates, continue to say thank you. When you are earning money, take your family out whenever you go home.

•Don’t take yourself so damn seriously… By not taking myself so seriously, I can try new paths without panicking. Like making a dinosaur birthday cake with my daughters whose head then falls off (the dinosaur’s head, not my daughters).

Or launching a Kickstarter campaign, even when a Grump-a-Lump told me that the amount equated only to a few days of McKinsey (her previous corporate employer in New York) pay. Or not dry heaving in front of millions when I was live on the Today Show pitching my invention.

These paths were dimly lit at best and were littered with unknown potholes. Each turn was scary. If I had taken myself too seriously, I would have U-turned and gone back to a comfortable road. "SERIOUS ME" would have taken the very lucrative path as the Chief Technology Officer for a Fortune 500 company. A job I know how to do.

Instead, I went down roads with long shadows. I crashed but grew much more than my serious perfectionist self, who was afraid of the dark. I had more fun. I found joy in my mistakes. Which isn’t hard when you're hanging out with Steve Martin in the Green Room of NBC Studios.

I’ll leave you with my favorite story from the launch of my invention, “loopit,” tangle free headphones that convert into a necklace. I was on the train ride home from the Today Show competition when someone recognized me. She and others on the train asked to see “loopit,” saw my passion, and they all voted for me. This carload of strangers then told me to go through Train 2165 to get MORE votes.

As someone who used to ride this train cranking on PowerPoint decks, I was VERY uncomfortable with their plan; what if I ran into an ex-client or even worse, a McKinsey partner? But these 10 strangers convinced me it was my moment. What if Train 2165 could make the difference between winning and losing?

So, off I went, car by car, sharing my story with more strangers who ALL were ecstatic to vote for “loopit,” except one guy pretending to be asleep, clearly a Grump-a-Lump. I know they were cheering for me the next morning, when I won that round! I still get goosebumps thinking of an entire train of people, who had no stake in my success, channeling my love and passion and doing their part to help me succeed. WOW.

So, let me ask you: When you have a Train 2165 moment, what are you going to do: seize the opportunity and have fun with it, or are you going to take yourself too damn seriously, worry that you can’t execute perfectly and sit down?

When you are in that moment, remember that you are powered by Penn Engineering.

You are powered to travel unlit paths. You are powered to change if you need to. You are powered to destroy biases in the workplace and do your part at home. You are powered to pull yourself out of huge potholes and make dinner reservations. I can’t wait to see the colors, shapes, size and designs of your vehicles…

Go forth, build and tinker.

Dr. Chan, who received her doctorate in engineering from MIT in 2000, lives with her family right behind Springside Chestnut Hill Academy and is on the school’s Board of Trustees.