August 24, 2006 Issue                                       

©2006 The Chestnut Hill Local

Kids Section

Papua New-Angry
By Jasper Anderson, age 10

Characters: Mr.Bartholemew (the reporter), Diamond Jack (the world’s most angry miner), Kicuhic and his cousin Chuck (the maniac mechanics), Tony (the expert on gigantic cars), and Cherry (Chuck’s little sister).

Mr.Bartholomew: “Good afternoon. This is Mr.Bartholomew reporting to you live from Papua New Guinea where Diamond Jack, the world-famous miner and his humorous assistants Kicuhic, Chuck, and Tony, an expert on gigantic cars, have created a machine that turns rocks into fuel for automobiles! They are now putting their finishing touches on it”.

Diamond Jack: “Okay people. All we have to do is put our little tire on this gadget…wait where is the tire?”

Tony: “I don’t know boss. It was in this bag”.

Diamond Jack: “RRRRR!”

Mr.Bartholomew: “While they search for the tire, Kicuhic “borrows” one from a nearby 18-wheel tractor-trailer (now known as a 17-wheel tractor-trailer) and brings it back to the gang”.

Diamond Jack: “Why did you bring us that, Kicuhic?”

Kicuhic: “I figured we needed a tire”.

Diamond Jack: “Boy, I ought to teach you a lesson!”

Kicuhic: “This isn’t school.”

Chuck: “Hey, he’s got a point there.”

Diamond Jack: “RRRRR! But that tire is so big!”

Tony: “It looks small to me.”

Diamond Jack: “Well, obviously. You’re an expert on gigantic cars. What do you think?”

Tony: “Well, I think about cars”.

Diamond Jack: “Egads! This isn’t going anywhere!”

Chuck: “Uh, Mr. Jack, our machine is making loud noises and sparks are flying out of it.!!”

Diamond Jack: “That’s the last straw!”

Chuck: “Darn! That means we can’t have anymore milkshakes, Kicuhic.”

Kicuhic: “Yeah, especially the ones with the big purple twisty straws. Phooey.”

Diamond Jack: “No, that’s not fair! RRRRRRR! I’m telling my mommy on you. Waaaahhh!”

Mr. Bartholomew: “Looks like someone is having a temper tantrum. Don’t try that at home.”

Cherry: “ Hi Chuck. Why is there a big, red, scary monster near you?”

Chuck: “I don’t know. But I think he stubbed his toe.”

Diamond Jack: “ No, everybody’s being GRRR- mean!”

Chuck: “Yeah, that’s it! Everybody’s being green, with our new machine. But he wants to pollute the air”.

Kicuhic: “Hey, he’s really mad. Maybe he needs to go to monster school.

Tony: “Hey guys I found the tire we were looking for. It was in my pocket all along”.

Everyone: “Tony!!”

Mr. Bartholomew: “Well everyone. Looks like I’d better go. There’s a lot of dirt flying everywhere. Stay tuned for Trini-mad and Tobago!”